Who I Am Hates Who I've Been

My mother helped me purchase a $1,600 lens today for my camera. It's made me look at how lucky I am. How fortunate I am to be where I am, with the people around me. Especially my family, who I've neglected to appreciate and spend time with the last few years.
Growing up is hard, and sometimes you just have to do things on your own, and it's been hard for them to understand, but I've made it this far, and they've gotten me an amazing start on life.


Dear Mom,
It's your son, and I can't tell you how much you mean to me. I wouldn't be anywhere if it weren't for you. You've saved my life from going down path's that I would never have come back from. You've given me advice that I've carried with me in my heart every day, whether I listened intently or blew it off, every word you've ever told me has been heard. You've paid my way for things when I never deserved it, and even when it wasn't right. You've bailed me out, and always been there for me.
I can't say I've done the same for you, and I can't even say that I've shown you or told you enough that I loved you.
More than anything in the world. More than any of the things you've bought me, more than any of the camera equipment you've helped me buy.
You've comforted me at my worst, you've stayed up at night to let me cry on your shoulder and told me everything was going to be ok....
You've taught me how to treat a girl, and how to deal with heartbreak.
I could have been stuck with anyone, anyone in the world, but I ended up with you.

Here it is.
I love you.
All the way around the world and back. Just like you used to tell me when I was little.
When you grow old I'm going to take care of you, when you get sick I'm going to be there. I'm sorry for every time I've ever yelled at you, or for all the time's I've said things that you never heard because I was so mad.
You are the reason I'm here right now.
You are the reason for all of my successes
and the reason for everything i've learned from my failures.

You will always be the most important woman in my life.
I'll never let anyone come before you again.
Not even myself.


To Mom and Dad,

I've been selfish these past few years, and I love you so much more for putting up with it.
I'll make you proud.
I swear.







To everyone at home,

Thank you so much for all the memories.
They keep me going when I feel alone, and they remind me where I came from and how I got here.
I miss you all.
Your in my heart all the time.


(Insert Picture Here)
The next time I come home I'm going to take a family picture with you.
I don't even have a picture of my own mother and father to upload.
We'll have one soon.



I'm changing myself.
Before I change the world.